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Father’s Day lets men tie one on


Column by Anthonette Klinkerman

Bill Cosby once said, “Fatherhood is pretending the gift you love best is Soap on a Rope.” To my poor dad’s credit, I think I may have actually given him that one Father’s Day. In reality, the favored gift must be the necktie, otherwise why would Baskin Robbins make an ice cream cake shaped like one?

So, for you dads out there, here is a brief history of your favorite fashion noose, the necktie. And please note I’ve taken my information from that ever-reliable source, Wikipedia. I checked a site on Buzzle.com, but the opening sentence reading, “Long time back, necktie evolved…” stopped me cold.

In the 1630s, the Croatian military uniform included a cloth tied at the throat. I’m not sure what the Croatian army was doing in France, but those always fashion-forward Parisians adopted the style to develop the cravat. The word Croat turned into cravat because of the French need to put an accent on everything.

Way before the Croatian army wandered into France, though, Roman orators were using small towels around their throats to keep their vocal chords warm. I’m inclined to believe this as I’ve heard Celine Dion humidifies the outside of her Lake Las Vegas home to protect her nationally treasured voice. However, since my heritage is Greek (and according to my dad the Greeks invented everything), the necktie was therefore a Greek invention.

These days, there are options including the bolo, the clip-on, the ascot, and the bow tie. None of them are comfortable. And they are health hazards. Not only are they entanglement risks, ties have been linked to infection risks at hospitals. If you think about this piece of material dragging in God knows what from one patient to the next, it makes sense. Hence the reason Britain banned ties in hospitals.

“Casual Friday” meant that ties could be left at home for one day of the week for professions where a tie was required. Call me old school, but seeing news anchors without ties is still a tad strange.

A woman wearing a tie is a little strange, too, but not as weird as a man wearing a skirt. Sorry, but kilts are NEVER going to catch on. If I was a male, I’d be seriously thankful.

Why wear them then? Reasons for ties include professional dress and showing signs of membership, and that’s about it. But in our casual every day society, a tie is such a rarity that it’s sure to make you stand out. Should you receive one this Father’s Day, with a pattern or a hula girl, wearing it puts you in the company of the greatest orators of all time, the Greeks. Just make sure not to dip it in your ice cream cake before you go work on your next patient.

CPC

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